The Cup of Life

I”ve made a big change in my life this month. The ads I have seen online have promised me that this will be the best move I have ever made as a woman, and that I will not only be saving the planet but also the delicate flora of my lady garden. That’s right, I have succumbed to the pressure and purchased a menstrual cup.

Now I must say I have been hesitant to make this purchase. For a start, they are selling for around $50, which is a lot of money for any woman to invest in her vagina without knowing if the product will work for her, or even work at all! What if I can’t get it in? What if it won’t stay in? What if (god forbid) I can’t get it out and I am up for a late night emergency department visit, trying to explain how I managed to get a little piece of silicone stuck in my cha cha, but how it was done with good intentions of cutting down on the damage of cotton farming and blocked drains? What about if this thing leaks, how can they guarantee an airtight seal when every woman is different? I think the scariest part for me that has left me pondering is how do I get it out without making a mess? There clearly needs to be some kind of trial period at home before I brave public cupping.

You are probably wondering well why the hell did I go and drop a quick fifty bucks on this bad boy if I have so many hesitations? Well, I don’t buy into the crappy reviews that I am always certain are from fake people anyway, but who I do listen to are friends, and I have heard only amazing things from women I know who use them. They all swear it is not as gross or fiddly as you assume, and that once you go cup, you never go back. Apparently it is quite the investment, $50 and you are done. No needing to stock the cupboard with tampons while you wait for your period to arrive. No running out of tampons at the last minute and being left stuffing wads of toilet paper down your undies while you do a quick servo run. A big selling point for me was when I read just how bad the cotton fibres that get stuck inside your vagina each month are for you. Not to mention the horror stories of women who forget they had a tampon in, then weeks later end up in hospital with a sore belly and a smelly hoo ha while they watch in horror as a team of nurses pull out a mouldy wad of what was once cotton. Oh, and the thing that really tipped me from hmmm maybe to I am so doing this was an ad that popped up in my feed advertising free menstrual cups, just pay postage and handling. Well, I was sold. I think I ended up paying about $7, and I actually got not one but TWO cups! Winning!

So why two cups I hear you ask? Well, here’s the bit that really weirded me out. Even more so than the thought of having a cup catching my period inside my giney… one cup was small and one was large. According to the website the small cup is for women with a light flow (ok, that makes sense) but it is also for women under 30 or who haven’t birthed a child vaginally. Naturally this means the large cup is for heavier flows, and also women over 30 or who have spat out a kid. Ok guys, I am going to stop you there and let you know I am not only slightly offended, but also seriously confused. Is the over/under 30 bit because something mysterious and unspoken occurs to your vagina when you hit the big 30??? Or is it because they assume by the time you reach the top of the hill you’ve probably copped a bit of a beating downstairs? Is there a mathematical equation for this theory or did some male just make the assumption and decided to run with it? AND  can I also just say that from my experience, and also what many gynaecologists and midwives have assured me is that your vagina is one giant muscle, it can stretch and stretch then it snaps right on back. In my defense, I even had a few stitches in there to keep it nice and tidy, and I did my kegels so I am pretty certain I can pass for a pre-30 vagina. I’ll certainly be trialling the mini cup before working my way up to the big daddy.  It would be less offensive if there wasn’t really much of a difference, but honestly, the little cup literally fits inside the bigger cup. And the big cup is so large, I feel like it should be taking me out to dinner before we make things FB official. It’s really quite intimidating.

26937980_2000675273484567_316199230_o

My cup/s finally arrived this week, just in time for the big event which will happen any day now. With this information, I can’t give you a firsthand account or review on the cup in action, but stay tuned for a blog either celebrating how easy my life has become, or maybe a live video from the ER. #cuplife

Here’s the link to get your own FREE CUP!

 

 

Advertisements

14 thoughts on “The Cup of Life

  1. I had a Diva cup and found that due to an angled cervix I was prone to spills and still had to use a liner ALL the time, worrying I’d spill a shot glass of blood every time. Using the pad/liner defeats the purpose, no? I’m going to give it another try.

    ________________________________

    Like

  2. Everything about your post has made me want to bite the bullet and try #cuplife.
    Also I have to add that as a first time reader your blog, this being the first post I’ve read too, you’ve just made me laugh SO much, thank you!

    Like

  3. These sound great! I’ve really wanted to try one. Having PCOS I have non regular but very heavy periods 😫 hope it works!

    I was wondering, sorry if it’s very personal, have you and Alee broken up?

    Like

    1. I think definitely give it a go. I’m still adjusting, some days I get it in first go others I might have to readjust it but it’s getting easier and so much more convenient.

      Aw that’s ok. Yes we have unfortunately. We haven’t made a point of announcing it but I think anyone cluey enough would piece it together. You’re actually the first person to ask me. Once we’ve taken some time to settle into our new lives I guess it means I have a whole new thing to blog about. For now though we are just both trying to adjust to living separately and co-parenting Oakland and ensuring he is happy and stable xx

      Like

      1. I’ll definitely be giving one a try! Anything to make that time of the month easier.

        I’m so sorry, again, for such a personal question. Only you two know why things are happening, as long as you’re taking care of yourself. I recently split with my babies father, so I can understand how hard it is trying to adjust to being in seperate homes, especially when it comes to a child and their routines. I hope you’re ok xx

        Like

  4. I’ve used one for over a year now and I would never go back! I clean it out in the shower morning and night and it really takes so much misery out of that time of the month, you forget you even have your period which is lovely. And it doesn’t have that funky smell like a tampon sometimes does when you remove it after a few hours. It just feels so much more hygienic! The only thing I find is that I need to use a little coconut oil to get in on the days my period isn’t that heavy. So this makes it a little difficult if you’re not at home to be able to do.
    It took me a little while to get used to, but there are plenty of tips available online if you have any trouble. Just keep trying! It’s well worth it! 🙂

    Like

    1. I totally agree! I’ve been using it and while it was a bit fiddly to begin with I think I’m getting the hang of it now. I love that I’m not having to change it constantly and yes, tampons and tampon bin smell is a thing of the past haha

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s