Boys and Their Toys

Can someone tell me, what is with males and their obsession with their penises? At any age, they just literally have their hands on it 24/7, whether it’s the comfort hold or the adjustment shuffle. I’d love to see the outcry if women just went around scratching and holding their va jay jays day in and day out.

Currently Oakland is toilet training and not responding well if he wears pants or undies. If he free balls we are sweet, he will go to the potty no dramas. But this means his little diddle is flying free at all times. Being a male, this also means his hand is glued to it! Nothing I do can get him to stop. I’m also aware of the fine line between teaching him to not touch it publicly and creating a sense of shame relating to his body. So I am currently just incessantly saying “hands off diddle!” until he’s a bit older and will understand touching diddles is something to do in private. I mean he’s only touching it because it’s there. But still, it is full time!!! And when he’s touching it too much he gets a baby boner which makes my life a little awkward.

As someone with two brothers, a bag of ex boyfriends and just a general knowledge of the male species, I can confidently say that this behaviour isn’t something they seem to grow out of. I always get instantly uncomfortable being in the vicinty of a guy who is scratching his balls or ‘adjusting’ himself. Where am I meant to look when this happens? Why do guys not even wince at the fact they are publicly playing with their genitals? I mean, they don’t even attempt to be discreet about it.

I’d love to hear your stories of what you say to your little boys. My mum favours the whole ‘if you keep touching it, it’s going to fall off!’. What works in your house? Or do I just need to come to terms with this being a thing for the rest of our lives?

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3 thoughts on “Boys and Their Toys

  1. Hah, I’m sorry I have no advice but this did make me chuckle slightly! But you’re totally right, there’s always some male whatever you go with his hands down there ‘rearranging’ or whatever their excuse is!
    Hope your potty-training goes smoothly! X

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  2. Lol this made me chuckle! My son is just coming up to 2 and has learnt what his penis is and loves to stand naked while wiggling it shouting “wiggle willy”…. cue absolute embarrassment when this happened when I was changing him recently at a friends house!

    Liked by 1 person

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